Sometimes the messages we receive are hard to read…
“My name is Amanda, I have spent my entire life in and out of foster care. It all started when I was 5. I was originally placed in foster care because my mother was on drugs and her husband was physically and sexually abusing my siblings and I.Shortly after being placed in the care of the state it was thought to be a good idea that I go live with my step fathers brother; that’s right they sent me to live with a non retaliative whos brother was just placed in jail for physically and sexually abusing me. As statistics go most tendencies to sexually assault a child and the urge to abuse your children is passed down to you by your parents, this was no exception in my new family. So shortly after being placed there the same abuse started again, this time I had two parents inflicting the abuse not just one. I was legally adopted by my new family when I was 7, not once was I pulled aside by a social worker to make sure there was no abuse going on. Because of the fact I was never pulled aside no one ever found out about the abuse, and the adoption was finalized. Over the years the abuse kept getting more and more severe, I even tried to report them to the police! Everytime my adopted parents would tell the police a list of reasons why I possibly had mental problems and that I was just making these things up, they were never questioned. I lived through this abuse until I turned 14. One day in a class at school I broke down crying, I revealed everything to my teacher that day. The police were called and finally I was believed. I was returned to foster care that night. For the next 4 years I would move over 12 times and attend 10 high schools due to the inconsistency of the foster care system. I was once told I had a better chance of winning the lottery than graduating with my high school class and going off to college because I had moved so much and I never had time to get caught up on the new work my school assigned me. Well I’m happy to say on June 5th 2013 I walked across the stage with my class and received my diploma, and I am currently attending a private lutheran college. One day I will become a lawyer and help change the laws, so the things that happened to me will never have to happen to another child again. I will open up a respite center for children living in group homes or foster homes, so when they feel alone and like theres no reason to move forward they will have somewhere to go and they will always have somebody to talk to. I wont stop until I have made a difference.”
After reading this message in a promise card request, I spoke with Amanda on the phone. She is doing well and is even playing softball in college because I said I would is so very proud of her accomplishments. Share this post if you are too.
Please know that there are resources available for the victims of sexual violence. You are not alone: http://rainn.org
Amanda, I am reading this through tears knowing that there is someone out there like you. I am currently a foster mom . Which most people think I am crazy for, but I do it in the hopes that someday I will help someone like you who will not be defined by their past, that does want a chance to have a different life. Unfortunatly many of the kids I take in don’t want it, but I hold on to the hope that some day there will be that 1 child that just needed a break that will make all the difference. I hold on to the fact that somewhere out there there is another child like you who just needs a chance to prove what they have inside them but have never been given that chance yet to show. You are AMAZING!!! What an inspiration!!!!
Amanda!
Thank you kindly for sharing, what I can only imagine, such a tough thing to “put out there”! It is because of people like you that someone who would not have otherwise listened to an abused child…now will.
We all make decisions in our lives and you could have easily chosen another path and blamed it on your past. I am incredibly proud of you for not only walking across the stage and receiving your diploma but for taking your unfortunate experiences, standing tall and saying this type of cruelty and abuse of children is NOT OK! I know in my heart that because of the sacrifices you were forced to make that many other children will not have to endure this type of torture.
THANK YOU!!!!! Your amazing story has only just begun and you are living on a level that few dare to go! You are setting a new standard and truly living with passion.
All my love
Steve
Amanda, I am so sorry you had to live through that. Although I was never a foster child, I grew up, survived and eventually thrived in spite of the the physical, emotional and sexual abuse. I applaud and appreciate your courage and determination. If and when you decide you need it, therapy can be very helpful.
Amanda, increíble relato el tuyo, casi se me saltan las lágrimas. Todo mi ánimo y apoyo. No estás sola, tienes a mucha gente metida en el corazón y estaremos aquí para levantarte cada vez que una piedra en el camino haga que tropieces. Mucha suerte, espero que tengas mucho éxito y eso será señal de que esta sociedad va a mejor. GRACIAS!
Amanda,
I admire your determination to create a better life for yourself! Your accomplishment of walking across the stage and enrolling in college is awe inspiring! I agree with Steve A when he said “you could have easily chosen another path and blamed it on your past” that’s not your style! You are too strong for that!
As a single dad, it makes me sad that someone was bestowed the honor of being a dad or a step dad and they screwed it all up. I know so many great dads but it only takes one bad apple to spoil the reputation of us all. Stay strong, Keep the faith. Show the way for those who follow you! You’re awesome!
Becus I Sadi I would is cool